How to deal with a girl today? Free psychological advice!
Guilt festers inside, it destroys the spiritual equilibrium and gradually leads man to chronic melancholia. Relationship is not the same as before, trust Positano, and restore it is not so easy, how to break. Even if you yourself are not guilty, sometimes you have to take the blame for the sake of mutual reconciliation.
A serious relationship can give rise to serious disagreements, and to learn to deal with them – vital.
How to behave after a fight – 5 rules of conduct
People tend long accumulating discontent and holding on to anger, like a bowl: slowly perepolnyali and pouring all accumulated in one moment. To avoid unpleasant consequences follow the rules:
- Remain a man under any circumstances, do not humiliate and do not fall at the feet of, be firm and somewhat cold-blooded to, what decision you will take. Drunk calls, messages, meetings – all this is so short and useless a lot, resorting to it should never. In the end, a girl could lose last to you attachments. Spoken words must be present confidence and assurance, not the pretentiousness and ridiculousness;
- Not pursue his chosen, do not twist constantly next, don't watch and don't watch, need to be there but, not too close, leaving right to personal space. If destined to an unexpected meeting, we can see on the street, shop, to meet company and so on. But to impose yourself is strictly prohibited, and why once again show how strong you are dependent on the decisions of another person. If the lady has forgiven you and wants to meet, you definitely learn about it, if she wants to talk, it with nothing to confuse;
- Attempts to induce jealousy over success only in Hollywood movies, real life is more complicated and multifaceted. Relationships are not divided into black and white, adjacent colors are always present in much larger quantities. Stereotype that jealousy is good and useful, applies only to extremely rare cases, and the men, good enough, to feel the line and to understand how the balance;
- Do not build intrigues and gossip, they spread like a bad wind. Friends with great pleasure will inform and embellish your words, and then, the chances for the resumption of relations would be equal to zero. If you really are sorry, in this case, it makes sense to choose the words better and nicer;
- You cannot truly make spiritual trauma material goods. Trying to bribe a woman with gifts – might work, but the senseless way. Who may be, heard about long love, built on money? You will always remain in the fear, fear of, someone else, just to give you more.
How long should tolerate
Think, here work saying: "Strike while the iron is hot!" – a serious misconception. It is understood, you both need time to re-evaluate values and answers to questions. To start a relationship with a clean slate, to change the handwriting.
The feeling of love and affection does not turn off completely, always keep yourself in the light. Time changes, but if the feelings remain – together with a dear person will be destined to.
Convergence after a conflict should be gradual, neat and slow, it is better not to rush the course of events and wait for the right occasion. It is impossible to act aggressively: the power to achieve reconciliation impossible.
It would be useful to look at the situation "from the girls", after understanding the, what exactly she wants to. Proper steps have to be taken on the basis of, what exactly happened between you. Domestic problems is one thing, a large-scale conflict is completely different.
How to reconcile with my girlfriend
Experienced difficulty together build confidence, sometimes they are even useful: to test the durability of a close person in a difficult situation and to know him more well. Of course, do not forget, that any disagreement can become the last, put a fat point in the relationship.
During the period of separation will not be superfluous to relax, to get my thoughts in order, to calm down and relax. Psychology of relationships recommends this approach, since adequate head standing ideas come more often – the decision may appear by itself. You will be able to soberly assess the situation and the person, to understand how much he is dear to you and take appropriate action.
Imagine future life, what awaits you together, how many get, from each other and what you can lose. "Do I need to put up?"to answer this question should be every man for himself.
If I'm to blame
Beware, do not fall for the tricks of self-deception! Save honor, courage and dignity, never humiliate and don't demand from a man, that he is not able to give love, respect, trust.
If you manage lowland concessions to return the favorite, she simply may not justify the effort and time. The tears and toil will have been wasted, but it's worth a lot!
When you yourself become a cause of conflict, then you will have to start with yourself:
- Describe in words what you did and why you did it. Take responsibility for your actions!
- Admit a mistake! I agree with the fact, what was wrong, with all my heart and regret their actions. That more such will not repeat.
- Maybe you underestimate the seriousness of the damage, in this case, it is wise to ask directly about the situation his darling.
- When I don't see the problem, maybe, it will be noticed by your friends, and help to deal with a girl
If she is guilty
Adhering to these tips, it will be easier to relieve pain, to understand the situation and contribute to your Association:
- Sooner or later, but best of all right now, stop holding on to anger and hurt dear heart and soul mate. Remember all the wonderful and spine-chilling memories, all, what you have in common before, and so long kept together. You can do this separately, but better and more productively together. Moments, when you were happy, able to regain feelings, even in the most difficult period;
- Easy, but not too expensive gift, symbolizing and transmitting your love for her, would be more than appropriate. A clay or porcelain figurine couple in love, gorgeous card with a beautiful poem or message, well, or some other romantic gift. Such a thing should not be surprising price tag, and attention, reminder, you still have the strongest feelings, just like in the period Dating;
- Better with a friend to stay, than without it around the world to wander! If renewed, the love affair is no longer possible, stay, at least close friends is also not a bad option. As a rule, the guys would be happy to communicate with his former ladies, Yes, and for girls this will not be a burden. Use this situation, start from the beginning! Again give signs of attention and care when convenient. Suddenly, at some point, all will sparkle with new colors and feelings will awaken from sleep?
- The easiest way is to directly offer to start all over again. To arrange a meeting, to wear very nice clothes, to recall the past and try again, courteous the mistakes of the past.
If you hit
In such a difficult situation we will need to move gradually, step by step. In the first place, decide: "For one I want to restore the faith of his girl in himself – for her sake, or for yourself?"
Such a rude reaction, like a punch or slap in the face to significantly underestimate the self-esteem of girls, she finds herself helpless and unloved. Short-term forgiveness is not the issue here, forgiveness in General – that's the best result.
Best eye to eye to bring a deep apology and to promise, never to allow such. Of course, sweet words after a brutal action to believe it will be difficult, so will have to try to be very convincing and give her the time needed for decision-making.
She will begin to treat you with concern, that trust will be restored for a long time. If this has happened to you before does not matter, there is an expression: "Hit once, you going to slap me". It needs to be refuted, every time demonstrating their love and the power of feelings: gifts, new experiences etc.
How to reconcile after infidelity
As the assault, excuses such misconduct does not exist, and can not exist. Bring your apology is meaningless, you need to act.
Get a wife or girlfriend will not be easy, but you connected with obligations, which can play a key role.
If I changed
First you need to let the wife calm down and talk it out if necessary. The first time she will not want you to see, therefore, all actions will happen as if at a distance. Make her a nice gift, corresponding to her hobby or occupation which will be delivered by a messenger to the house. You kill two birds with one stone:
- Don't annoy with your presence;
- Make it clear, what you remember and appreciate her Hobbies.
When the time is right crucial conversation, it is important to avoid a fatal and very common mistake to justify their stupidity. Good reasons can not be, you both understand that, the only, I want a woman in this situation is your confession and repentance.
The situation is under control ladies, before her stands a clear choice – divorce or forgiveness, and not even worth trying to take control into their own hands, she needs to feel that decides your fate. A period of reflection is able to drag on painfully for months, this time, when the storm of emotions settles and the time comes to get her again.
If it has changed
Cheating women – perhaps, this is the most difficult and painful of possible shocks for men. There is nothing worse betrayal. And so, noticing, that the wife is cheating on you, what you may not realize, should adhere to these useful tips:
- You need to know, how often it happens – one-time phenomenon, or permanent;
- Understand the reason for its dastardly act;
- Do not make hasty and sharp insights, carefully analyze the situation;
- Directly conversation – knowing the causes, you can draw conclusions. Maybe she does not feel more to you and no feelings will soon go. Or just broke her burning passion. Again, either to forgive, either to go, maybe, it sincerely regret the trick;
- If she repents and ask for forgiveness, make decisions, referring to the following: "Will you trust her in the future?".
- Family psychologist can help to sort out their feelings and make the right decision. In any case, it all depends on the strength of the feelings, attachment, the ability to forgive and to trust.